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Post by GiveInToMe on Oct 25, 2009 19:40:33 GMT -5
Poetgerri,
WELCOME! thanks for sharing and I DO hope we see you more often in the forum....please invite others from you YouTube channel to join!.
I understand exactly how you feel cause that's exactly how we all feel about Michael....
I don't know if you have got the chance to read most of the posts here but we are learning how to connect with him and it's incredible!. Speaking for myself....it's been an rich experience which is helping me a lot in my own personal and spiritual growth....
Again, welcome and thanks for participating ;D
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Post by loveisadoughnut on Oct 25, 2009 20:29:28 GMT -5
Welcome Gerri! I'm so delighted you've come to join us. You've sure found the right bunch of people because we're all in the same boat with the inexplicable grief and having people around us who don't understand it and want us to be 'normal' again. That is the common thread among every member of this forum.
Welcome!!
Peace, Nut
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Post by MaryAnn Layton on Oct 26, 2009 0:58:23 GMT -5
Welcome Gerri!
One of our members at MJ's Army noticed your fantastic Youtube channel, so we really wanted you to join us, and thank you for coming! You've done an amazing job with your channel, and you'll notice we've posted some of your videos here to share with all. Our group was formed, and then this forum just one month ago, for the same reason you felt the urge to start your channel... we have all been "driven" to make a difference in the world, being "touched" by Michael's passing with horrific grief, just like so many people around the world.
We really don't know why his death affected us so much... you will see just how much as you read the posts here. Some of us weren't even MJ fans, that is until June 25th! What we do know is that we have been changed forever, thanks to Michael, and there is no going back. We have been chosen to share his message of unconditional love and understanding, to make a difference in the world, and we're up for the challenge!
You will also notice we're learning to connect with Michael, and it is the most beautiful thing I have ever gone through. Words can't describe it, but connecting with his beautiful spirit is truly life changing, and a miracle we want to share with as many people as possible.
Welcome again, and we look forward to your posts!
Namaste,
Mary-Ann
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Post by poetgerri on Oct 27, 2009 12:40:39 GMT -5
Hi Mary Ann and to all the others here on this wonderful site.
I am glad to be a member of your group. I was going to write a message, but have to finish up a project at work right now. I will write out a message this evening when I get home.
Gerri
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Post by ida on Oct 27, 2009 13:22:23 GMT -5
Hi Gerri and welcome to our group! We're glad to have you here Your YouTube channel is fantastic! I just checked it out. I look forward to get to know you better! You should really look forward to the Skype calls and the Circles of Love! Welcome Gerri! Love always, Ida
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Post by Ann on Oct 27, 2009 13:29:17 GMT -5
Hi Gerri,
Welcome to our family of Michael's love.
I am glad you joined us and I have to admit that I LOVE your channel.
Since the day I become a Michael Jackson fan, I have met wonderful people and true friendship under Michael's love and inspirations. It's amazing.
Can't wait to have you with us on the next Skype call and Circle of Love to connect to Michael.
I love you more, Ann (aka ilovemj5809 on youtube)
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Post by poetgerri on Oct 27, 2009 19:15:09 GMT -5
Hello to all
Well, I don't need to tell any of you how these last 4 months since Michael's death have been quite an emotional and spiritual journey.
The hardest part is that it has been so difficult to communicate to the people in my life - family, friends, co-workers - exactly what I am feeling. I cannot tell them why sometimes just hearing Michael's voice in a song fills me with an overwhelming hearache. Or why I can't stop looking at pictures of him and falling into those eyes.
I'm not sure if I can honestly say I've connected with Michael in a 'real' way. I haven't seen him or felt his touch. And yet, I definitely feel that it has been him that has driven me to re-connect to my creativity by setting up this YouTube channel, and to begin writing my poems with a passion I've not had for almost 5 years.
The one connection I have had to him lately is when I hear the song, For All Time, which is on the Thriller 25th Anniversary CD. I don't know if he sings the song in a different key or what. But every time I hear it, I get real emotional and feel like I'm about to loose it. When he says the line, 'when I say I love you, it's for all time.' Don't know if it is some kind of message from him to me, but I can say I've never had this strong a reaction to any of his other songs before.
I do admit that a part of me is afraid of becoming too 'obsessive.' Afraid of being a little 'crazy'; afraid to exposing innermost thoughts to others, of how I'll be viewed by others. It is something I've been struggling with ever since Michael's memorial, where I cried harder than I ever have in my entire life.
It is hard to know for sure I guess, but maybe the fact that I got this invitation AND heard that song for the first time all within days of each other means I am now ready to stop being afraid, to let go of my fear...
Maybe now I am ready to take those steps to connect with Michael, and somehow to connect to something spiritual within me as well. We have been having many Sunday lessons at church that deal with forgiveness, love and connecting with our heart's desire. Surely these lessons and all the other things that have happened have not been an accident.
Well I guess I'll stop babbling on for now. Thank you all for being here and understanding this collective 'sweet obsession' with Michael.
Gerri
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Post by MaryAnn Layton on Oct 27, 2009 21:50:18 GMT -5
Thanks for sharing, Gerri. We definitely know what you've been going through We've all been there, done that. As you'll read throughout the forum, we caution everyone not to share our Michael feelings with friends and family, because they really will never understand, will they? Unless they were "touched" like we were, there is no point. That's why we created this forum, so that those who are grieving have a safe place to come to, where it's all about sharing our love and understanding. My own story - my world changed on June 25th and I fell into such horrific grief I have never felt before, even after losing both parents. I didn't understand why I was so upset, why I cried all day, every day, why my life seemed to stop and Michael consumed every thought. After all, I wasn't even a big fan! Sure, I loved his music but I wasn't a fanatic! So trust me, you are not alone! I hope you will read about how to connect with Michael... if you need any help with that or have questions, let us know. Namaste, Mal
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Post by loveisadoughnut on Oct 29, 2009 16:59:35 GMT -5
Welcome Gerri! I'm so glad you've joined us Love your YouTube channel and the work you're doing there
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Post by mirror4change on Oct 29, 2009 18:50:08 GMT -5
Hi Gerri and all new!!
So glad you found us!!
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Post by karencanada on Nov 7, 2009 23:40:04 GMT -5
Hi Everyone, First I have to say I'm sitting here with tears threatening and a huge lump in my throat, because I feel like I've come home...to a place and to people who know and understand without my having to explain or justify what I am feeling...or hide it. Coincidentally, 'speechless' just started playing as I started typing too I also want to thank Poetgerri for leading me here, big love to you for that! I live in a small town in the mountains of British Columbia, Canada, where I originally moved ten years ago for love, of both a man and the mountain lifestyle. Both the man and the lifestyle have kind of exited my life since then, but here I still am I worked as a forest fire fighter for many years before returning to school four years ago to become a Registered Massage Therapist. Fire was exciting and I love being outdoors and working physically, but my heart/spirit weren't satisfied with the work; I wanted to do something that helps other people. I feel that my job now does that, and I love it...one by one, figuring out why people are in physical pain and trying to find ways to alleviate it...sometimes I can feel healing happening, and those moments make my work so meaningful for me. I am similar to many others here; my early teens coincided with MJ's explosion into stardom; I remember biking to the local mall to buy my first album, Thriller I lost track of MJ after highschool as I embarked on a decade of travelling and seasonal work ( Ann I LOVE travelling and meeting people from other cultures, it's a deep passion for me!). I occasionally saw tabloid covers but never opened one to read it. I left TV behind 20 years ago...so I had no real knowledge of anything MJ for two decades. When he died, I followed a similar path of discovery to Gerri and others here...the deep, heart-rending grief that took me by surprise, followed by a youtube journey into discovering the most beautiful spirit and talent of Michael Jackson. I felt and continue to feel ripped apart by his death, but also inspired daily by his words, and his works. I was in a crappy car accident last Christmas, and have been recovering from injuries since, and unable to play the way I usually do ( rock climbing, running, back country snowboarding). I've been struggling to redefine myself and find new passion since this happened...and along came Michael... with a power and inspiration to change my life! I really feel that his passing instigated a profound spiritual transformation for me. I've been hesitant to admit this to anyone but I feel safe here, and think I am here because-- I have been struggling a lot since MJ's death, and the suicide of a friend this summer too...and I'm really feeling the need for support through this healing process. Just finding this place, a sort of sanctuary of understanding and support, gives me hope that I can find and fight my way through this. I am SO grateful to the founders and to all of you here creating a circle of love that is palpable through words on a computer screen. Thank You. Finally, I want to say that discovering the incandescent, beautiful Being Michael Jackson has humbled, healed, inspired, and helped me crystallize some spiritual beliefs that, once I get through this healing journey ( which may last a lifetime, lol) will make me daily a better person..i feel the small changes ever single day as my heart becomes more gentle and loving and my understanding of the sacredness of life grows and blooms. Isn't it amazing how this man has touched us all? I feel touched by an angel........I think we all have been. With thanks and love in my heart, and so ( !!!!) looking forward to meeting and sharing with all you beautiful people!
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Post by jacque on Nov 8, 2009 0:19:06 GMT -5
Welcome to our wonderful, supportive group, Karen! I had tears in my eyes reading your story. It IS simply amazing to me how all of us, from all over the world, have found our way here to help each other go through our own very personal grieving process! I turned to the Internet to find out all I could about Michael, because I knew very little and wanted to find out why the entire world seemed to be grieving his death. What I found there simply overwhelmed me! I watched Michael's videos, listened to his music, and read fan forums. I was at a loss to understand what I was experiencing, as I hadn't even owned an MJ album before he passed. I felt as grief-stricken as I did when my parents and brother died, and the extreme grief has lasted much longer. I connected with PoeticOwl through her You Tube channel and later to a whole group of people through her. THANK YOU, Owl, from the bottom of my heart!! Later, around the time of our first Circle of Love, Nut and Mal created this fantastic forum for us! By experiencing our Circles of Love and Nut's communications with Michael, I have come to understand why I was feeling the way I do. I have no one in my daily life with whom I can discuss my feelings for Michael. That is why this forum has become a life support system for me. I feel safe here and know I won't be judged and looked at as if I'm crazy or something. And Michael's challenges to all of us is something that is helping me to grow spiritually and to hopefully discover exactly what my mission on earth is. I am so excited about that! Michael's love, compassion, and desire to heal the world was and continues to be truly inspiring! I love him from the depths of my soul and I love this group, too! I believe together we CAN change the world! We are so glad to have you here with us, Karen! I love you more! Jacque
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Post by MaryAnn Layton on Nov 8, 2009 7:26:10 GMT -5
Welcome Karen! We're so glad you found us... your story is so similar to ours. I truly believe that Michael led you to us Looking forward to your posts, and welcome home! I love you more, Mal
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Post by GiveInToMe on Nov 8, 2009 11:16:30 GMT -5
A warm WELCOME to Norma and Karen! Thanks for joining!
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Post by ida on Nov 8, 2009 11:42:32 GMT -5
Welcome Karen! Thank you for your kind words, as well as Jacque, I had tears in my eyes while reading your story...My story is pretty much the same. I don't think I have ever felt so confused like I felt the time after Michael's passing. If it hadn't been for this amazing group of fantastic people, I'm afraid of how I would have done right now. Words simply can't describe my how thankful and blessed I am to be a part of this. But since we all have been and still are grieving, we all know that we are all thankful... I am very happy that I've written down my thoughts in notebooks and by mail, so that I can remember how I was feeling the first months. You can compare this forum to a diary. I'm looking forward to read your thoughts and get to know you better, and again - WELCOME!! Lots of love, Ida
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Post by carol81054 on Nov 8, 2009 20:02:15 GMT -5
Hi Everyone..My name is Carol...I am 52 years old...I have always been a fan of Michael Jackson and will continue to be until I die..My Grandchildren are total fans of Michael..Its great to see that the generations go on in being his fans...
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Post by GiveInToMe on Nov 8, 2009 20:15:18 GMT -5
Welcome Carol! I'm glad you found us ;D Isn't that cool that generations of any age could be fans of the same artist? That's our Michael! Hope to see you often in the forum
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Post by poetgerri on Nov 8, 2009 20:52:19 GMT -5
Welcome to to Carol and Karen, from one 'newbie' member to another!
Karen, I am so glad you accepted my invitation to become a part of this group. You are one of the many people I connected with through my YouTube channel and I have to say how glad I am that Michael brought us together.
And thank you for sharing the story of your own personal journey. How interesting that our lives are so diverse, yet we all converge at this one central space: our grieving for Michael and that inner urging pushing us to heal our beautiful, broken world.
Gerri
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Post by jacque on Nov 9, 2009 4:15:57 GMT -5
A BIG welcome and a hug, Carol! I'm so glad you found us, but there was a reason for that!! We are about the same age (I am 53, but still act like a child sometimes - in a good way!) and about the same age as Michael! I love it that people of ALL ages are able to enjoy Michael's music and really get into him! Michael is timeless and his legacy will continue into eternity!! Glad you're here! Jacque
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Post by MaryAnn Layton on Nov 9, 2009 4:46:41 GMT -5
A warm welcome to you, Carol! And to our other new members who joined us on Sunday. We hope that you'll log in often and post!
Check out all of our favorite videos, tributes, interviews, etc. Also be sure to read the Messages From Michael category, which will help you to heal if you are grieving. We of course, are here for you too... you won't find a more supportive group anywhere!
It's only with love, L.O.V.E.
Mal
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Post by loveisadoughnut on Nov 9, 2009 10:30:39 GMT -5
Welcome Karen and Carol
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Post by jriccob6301 on Nov 9, 2009 20:53:45 GMT -5
Hi , everybody my name is Jean. I presently live in Ocala Florida. I have been a fan of Michael Jackson ever since I can remember. I started listening to his music when I was just a small child, way back in the 70's. I was so overwhelmed with grief when i heard of his passing. I can't stop listening to his music and searching for him on the internet. Michael what an extraordinary person.. I will love him forever !!!!
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Post by GiveInToMe on Nov 9, 2009 21:00:35 GMT -5
Welcome to the forum Jean, you came to the right place!
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Post by MaryAnn Layton on Nov 9, 2009 23:17:24 GMT -5
Welcome Jean! Thanks so much for joining us. Be sure to read the Messages from Michael category, if you're interested in connecting with his beautiful spirit.
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Post by Norma on Nov 9, 2009 23:24:55 GMT -5
Hello Everyone... My name is Norma... I want to thank Gerri for sharing this site with me... I was born in Edinburgh, Scotland and grew up in the Black Hills of South Dakota... I became a citizen 3 yrs ago and am so proud to be an American... I am divorced and have one son... I am a Jeweler for the last 28 years... I make Black Hills Gold Jewelry... I think that is as crafty as I get lol... I have been a fan of Mike's since I was 12 yrs old since 1968... Hard to believe that he has been a part of me that long...He has been with me in every stage of my life... His music means alot to me...His words got me through alot of my own pain... To know that this MAN was as lonely as the rest of us and was loved by millions breaks my heart...I wished that I could of been that friend that he was looking for...I would of had an ear, a shoulder, and an open-heart with no strings attached... He helped me so much through his words...How I would of loved to of been there for him...The night I was watching his movie...I started to cry when he sang "I'll Be There"... Because that was my very first 45 I played that record until it was light grey... How could that little boy have so much passion to sing like that... But the real reason I was crying was not so much for that but who would now take care of us and our children...And the EARTH...Who else will have that much passion and love for our envirorment...This world is a quiet and sad place now that we have lost him... Not a day goes by that I don't listen to his music...I have a channel page over on Youtube and have been watching video after video of this MAN... Creating this page has given me a place to understand my lose... I feel that he is still here and alive...And I guess in away he will always be here in all our memories of him... I think I have cried everyday since his death...I remember on that day... We were talking at work about the lose of Farrah Fawcett ... And talking about how they come in 3's... When I got home I had turned the tv on and saw that Mike was being rushed to the hospital...I just stood in front of the tv as the ambulance was backing out of the drive and saying "Oh, God not him...Not him...Don't take him...Not him"...Then an hour later they said that he had died... I hate to say this but I was so mad at God for doing this... I know that's not right but I just couldn't believe that he took him... There are people out there that are haters and still make rude comments about him and they know that I am a big fan of Mike's... They say you know what he is like and I say that is your opinion... My boss one day said you know what he was accused of and I said that is not fair that he was found innocent... And she said there are things out there that prove that he did it... And I said " Well, prove me wrong"... And she shut right up... People like that make me sick...They only go by what the press says like that is gold...I wished I could of told Mike...For one hater there were a million loves... He will always be in my heart...He has made me want to be a better person... I don't have alot of money to give but I do have time... I will miss this man forever and he will be in my heart till the day I die... God Bless You Mike and Your Children...
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